I don't know how far this horse will carry me, I may--before "kindest regards"--go in a different direction. I'm going with it anyway.
A thought along that line just occurred to me. (true story): An old-time country preacher I knew growing up, loved to fox and coon hunt. One Saturday night he stayed out too late; he hadn't been into his sermon very long when he closed his Bible and sat down. A couple of the deacons rushed forward with the excited question, "Preacher are you all-right?"
"I'm fine," he said, "I just ran out of SOAP."