Beech Tree News Network

Grandparents are often characterized as “spoiling” their grandchildren, telling too many when-I-was-young stories, or being too bossy. I try not to be that grandparent, but I am occasionally guilty of doing one or the other. Today, I am choosing to be bossy: I have some advice for my grandchildren documented below.

 First, I believe every generation struggles to find their way in life. So, some general guidelines that I would recommend for life include the following:

·       Know God and attend the church of your choice regularly.

Church is like extended family, and they encourage one another during the hard times.

·       Be kindhearted and compassionate, without being a “doormat.”

I’ve read that compassion cannot be taught, but I don’t know. I do know that treating others with kindness is important to your happiness and that of others. However, allowing another person to use you repeatedly is not showing kindness to that person or to yourself, and it’s unhealthy.

·       Live within your means or budget.

This sounds easy, but I assure you that it is not. However, if you practice living within your means, your life will be less stressful and much happier.

 Next, when you’re choosing a career, find something that you like. My parents taught me that I should be able to support myself and any dependents that I might have; this is a gender-neutral rule, applying to both male and female. Another consideration when choosing a career is the salary earned in a particular job. We should consider whether the job will finance a lifestyle that will be satisfying. Also, be prepared to continue your education in order to change positions and/or improve your income – this is often necessary.

 Then if you choose to marry, take your time selecting a mate. Don’t rush this decision. Some specific advice includes the following:

·       Choose a mate who is independent and confident enough to be a partner, someone who will help create a peaceful, orderly home as well as help ensure the family’s financial wellbeing. Work together for the good of the family; most chores are gender neutral. Be supportive when your mate chooses to get more education, to change jobs, or take steps to be healthier.

·       Show your mate respect. Men, do not criticize your mate’s appearance, cooking, etc. Women, do not criticize your mate to others and do not nag. Recognize that both genders occasionally need time with friends: women need girl time, and men need the company of other men.

·       If you realize that you are in danger, find the courage to leave. We can’t fix everything.

 Finally, it has been said: “Children may close their ears to advice, but they keep their eyes open to an example” (http://www.searchquotes.com/Children/quotes/about/Advice/#ixzz4pPtIZ1pe). I certainly have not been a perfect example, but I’ve lived awhile. I pray each one of my grandchildren finds his/her path to a peaceful, productive, happy life. Regardless, their Granny and their family love them.