Beech Tree News Network

Who is your friend? Dictionary.com defines friend as “a person known well to another and regarded with liking, affection, and loyalty” (http://dictionary.reference.com/browse/friend). Most of us have friends – some friends are closer to us than others.

Many have shared their thoughts about friendship. A few of those comments are listed below:
•    Friends are the family you choose – Jess C. Scott
•    True friendship comes when the silence between two people is comfortable. – David Tyson Gentry
•    Love is blind; friendship closes its eyes. – Friedrich Nietzsche
•    A friend is someone who knows all about you and still loves you. – Elbert Hubbard
•    You can always tell a real friend: when you’ve made a fool of yourself, he doesn’t feel you’ve done a permanent job. – Laurence J. Peter
•    Sometimes being a friend means mastering the art of timing. There is a time for silence. A time to let go and allow people to hurl themselves into their own destiny. And, a time to prepare to pick up the pieces when it’s all over. – Octavia Butler
•    Growing apart doesn’t change the fact that for a long time we grew side by side; our roots will always be tangled. I’m glad for that. – Ally Condie
•    Sweet is the memory of distant friends! Like the mellow rays of the departing sun, it falls tenderly, yet sadly, on the heart. – Washington Irving

Earlier this year, NPR’s Rob Stein reported on the findings of a study conducted by James Fowler, University of California, San Diego, and Dr. Nicholas Christakis, Yale University, saying that genetically people appear to be more like their friends than strangers. This health moment explained that, based on the study, “friends are as genetically similar as fourth cousins” – as if they shared “a great- great- great- grandparent” (http://www.npr.org/blogs/health/2014/07/14/331354227/do-we-choose-our-fr...).

Many of us would say that we choose our friends because of their qualities. So, I asked friends and family about important qualities in a friend. Their replies are listed below:
•    Honesty.
•    Honesty. Loyalty. Dependability.
•    Number one is loyalty, but I also want a friend who will tell me the truth, even if it’s something I don’t necessarily want to hear.
•    Listen to me whine. Laugh with me. Courage to set me straight. Forgive me when I’ve done wrong.
•    Fun, like interests, trustworthy, and hard-working.
•    Loyalty and time for you.
•    I have been blessed with amazing friends. True friends love you at your best and your worst. They are honest, trustworthy, encouraging, and stand by you no matter what.
•    Even when you do not call, even when they know you are not being honest with yourself, they hold no judgment, no grudges. But, they always answer when you call and listen. A friend has unconditional caring.
•    Not telling things you trust them with.
•    Similar interest. Love for the Lord. Always there.
•    Honesty, loyalty, empathy, integrity, and (not least by far) caring.
•    As a schoolgirl with many friends, I wondered why my mom seemed to have so few in comparison. I even wondered if maybe she wasn’t liked or popular for some reason I couldn’t see. Now that I am older, I can relate to her explanation that two or three close friends were all she needed. My long-term, closest friends have proved themselves to be loyal people with strength of character and genuine kindness. We share similar values and morals, even if our hobbies and opinions are very different. These are people who make me feel loved and worthwhile. There are only a few like this, but I count them as tremendous blessings.
•    Good sense of humor and honesty.
•    Optimistic, fun-loving, supportive, and not judgmental. My daughter would add loyal and adventuresome.
•    Someone who is there for me 24/7, on good days, bad days and every day in between. Someone who tells me what I need to hear, not just what I want to hear. And, they know I am there for them in the exact same ways. And, they will pray for me and with me.
•    My true friends are open-minded, kind in their honesty, trustworthy, present, and an equal partner in the give and take of a friendship. And, my best friends make me laugh and laugh and laugh.
•    Kindness and loyalty are the two that come to mind, but it sure helps if they are amusing, interesting and easy to be with.
•    Honesty, trustworthiness, and humor. I think those three are the best qualities a friend could have!
•    Integrity, trustworthiness, sense of humor, similar values, and like doing the same things.

Friends are important people. Proverbs 17:17 (NIV) says, “A friend loves at all times….” I’ve also heard it said that to have a friend, you must be a friend. So, it seems that friendship requires a bit of work. But, the effort is certainly worthwhile and makes the world a better place.