Beech Tree News Network

Life is full of people with really good intentions.  When people find out that you are an adoptive family, you get asked questions from strangers and even friends that are meant to be harmless.  Unfortunately, sometimes even well intended questions or comments, can be intrusive or hurtful.   This is just a small example of what I and some of my friend’s who have also adopted, have been asked in the past.  I don’t know about my friends, but I find that honey (humorous answers) works better than vinegar (harsh comebacks) when getting a point across. 

Which one is your real child?
Vinegar:  So you are saying because my children are adopted, that makes them less “real”? 

Honey: Real child?  Oh my dear, the real ones were so darn expensive that we decided to get the fake ones.  I got them on Canal Street up in New York City.  They look so much like the real thing that no one knows they are counterfeit!  Plus, I got a great looking Louis Vuitton purse at the same time!

You’ll probably get pregnant now that your have adopted?
Vinegar:  I can’t get pregnant, so no, I doubt it.

Honey:  Uh….that’s not quite how getting pregnant works?  Hasn’t anyone had “the talk” with you?  No?  Then let me explain:  when two people love each other…

Why Did His Real Mother Give Him Away?
Vinegar:  First of all, I am his real mother and secondly, his biological mother made a huge sacrifice so that her child could have a better life.

Honey:  Well, I am his “real” mother and even though I have tried to give him away, they keep bringing him back.

Wow! They look just like YOU! 
Actually, this one doesn’t bother me because I think it’s funny!  I have a fair complexion, freckles, green eyes and brown hair (at least that’s what the box of Miss Clairol says most months).  Put it this way, my brother’s pet name for me is Casper.  Get the picture?  My boys, who are part Hispanic, have beautiful thick, dark brown hair, Hersey brown eyes and in the summer, their skin turns the color of perfectly browned biscuits.  Oh yeah, we look just alike.

Was their real mother on drugs?
Vinegar:  No, was yours?

Honey:  Okay, I think we have already established that I am their real mother, were you not listening?  Depending on what day you ask me, I might be on drugs but they are prescribed and they make me happy, happy and keep the voices at bay.
 
Do they know they are adopted? 
Vinegar:  If they didn’t, they do now!

Honey:  Shhhh, keep it down!  I don’t want my husband to know that the boys are not his!

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C. Denise Lambrianou is the Program Coordinator for Family Enrichment Center-Adoption Resource Program, which is funded in part by a grant from the Cabinet of Health and Family Services, Department of Protection and Permanency and Wendy’s of Bowling Green.  If you would like information about becoming a foster or adoptive family, or you would like to inquire about a featured child, please call (270) 781-6714 x 3 or (866) 842-9032 x 3.

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About Monesha:
Monesha (5/99) is a cute 13 year old that has recently become available for adoption.  She needs a forever family with good boundaries and a lot of structure.  She loves physical activities and sports including basketball, volleyball, softball and swimming. Monesha loves food and when asked about the types of food that she prefers, she just kept listing things that she loves to eat - including all types of fast food, fried catfish, corn, green beans, peas and asparagus.  She did indicate that she doesn’t care for brussel sprouts or cauliflower. Her favorite colors are red and pink and she really enjoys playing with little children.  If you love shopping, Monesha is the girl for you.  She enjoys shopping for everything, from clothing to household items.  When she is done with shopping, she is really just getting geared up to beat you at a video race car game.  Monesha would be interested in a family with younger children, that likes to go shopping, and that would like to plant and grow a garden.  Do you have a home that would welcome a teenage girl?