Beech Tree News Network

Our nephew, Brad, passed away last week.  He was Garey’s sister’s son.  Charlotte was the one who found him.  He died in his sleep at just 38 years of age.  Brad still lived at home with her.  He had concluded that he would never find the “right one.”  The girls he dated “either died or moved away,” he said.  

Brad had so many friends, because he knew how to be a friend.  His group of guys had been together since their daycare days.  I was in charge of putting the photo gallery together for his visitation.  I felt like I knew those boys, who are now men, by the time I finished.  There were pictures of Brad with a guitar in a band with his friends, dressed as pirates with his friends, on hikes in the woods with his friends, and just hanging with his friends.

They were all there, at his funeral.  Brad went out of his way for anyone who needed help.  That’s what each of those guys told me.  They would be his pallbearers—8 in total.  I watched as a young man entered the funeral home, pulling a wagon containing 4 young children.  He kept wiping tears from his eyes.  As he waited in the receiving line, he told me that he was one of the guys in the picture of the band.  He hadn’t been able to get a sitter, so he loaded the 4 children up—one was under a year old—and brought them with him, so he could show up for his friend one last time.

One of the scenes I will always keep with me is the sight of our three girls, Natalie, Nikki and our granddaughter, Sabria, huddled together, holding on to one another, sobbing beside Brad’s casket.  He was so much a part of Natalie and Nikki’s childhood, and Sabria’s visits to her Aunt Charlotte’s.  His brother Jason has a small son who loved his Uncle Brad.  He drew a picture for him that Jason slipped into the casket, along with a letter Jason had written to his brother.

Brad’s mom, Charlotte, depended on him so much.  She has had several broken bones and surgeries, and Brad was always right there for her to help her through recovery.  This year he had already gotten her an Apple watch for Christmas, so she would be able to contact emergency services in case she fell when he wasn’t there.  Maybe on some level, he knew.

Like the rest of us, Brad had his problems.  At times, they got the best of him, but when he fell down, he didn’t just get back up for himself.  He always had compassion for those who had fallen around him.  He was never a one-man-show.

Most people know what the 23rd Psalm says, “The Lord is my shepherd…”  The last verse of that Psalm is the one that stands out for me.  “Surely goodness and mercy shall follow me all the days of my life…”  For years, I read that verse as though it meant that God was going to make sure I received goodness and mercy, but that’s not really what it says.  The verse says, “Goodness and mercy shall FOLLOW me.”  Wherever Brad went, goodness and mercy were sure to follow.

Flavia Weedn said, “There is no greater wisdom than kindness.”  I guess that makes my nephew Brad one of the wisest people I have ever known.