Beech Tree News Network

Boys Will Be Men: From personal observation—and I realize that doesn’t mean it’s set in stone—it seems that boys without a positive role model and direction, struggle more than girls who don’t have a positive female role model.  Maybe, it’s because women are such nurturers.  If we see a young person struggling—male or female—we tend to take them under our wing.  That’s all fine and good, but women can’t provide male perspective.  (Before I continue, I apologize to all of the feminists upon whose toes I will inevitably tread.)

Men just look at things differently, and therefore handle things differently.  For one thing, they usually don’t take things as seriously as women.  I’ve often said you can tell by the title of a book, if a male or female wrote it.  It’s no shock that Don’t Sweat The Small Stuff was written by a man.  Guys handle a lot of stressful stuff with humor.  

In my younger days, I used to get so mad at my husband, Garey, because I thought he was making light of things that were important to me.  I thought he just didn’t understand the seriousness of the situation enough to be as upset as I was.  Over time, I learned that this wasn’t the case.  Garey was just defusing the situation with humor, a skill which I eventually acquired and would like to believe was innate all along, but one I probably learned from him.

Young guys are always stopping by our shop (New Image Car Care) to get their daily dose of jawing, kidding and affirmation.  Garey, Greg and Tim don’t leave them disappointed.  Tim has nick-named some of them—Goober, Gomer, Opie—and they answer to the name he greets them with.  Greg says things to them like, “Got one tied out?” before deer season; and, “Bet that made ya mad,” as he looks at the picture of a big buck the boy has killed.  Garey, who reloads his own ammo, talks shop about guns and shells and scopes.  Tim gets out the picture of the monster buck his friend in Indiana took down.  The boys eat that stuff up, of course.  It’s a rite of passage for them—talking about the hunt with the old warriors.  

It’s not just hunting either.  The guys talk sports and cars and academics.  They treat all subject matter with equal respect, because the interest isn’t in the achievement, it is in the young man personally.  When you give someone your time, you’re giving them affirmation.  You’re saying, You are important enough to be listened to.  Affirmation is a valuable commodity for anybody, especially the young.

It is no surprise to me that young men spend some of their spare time at our shop, and it’s also no surprise that the ones who have moved on to college or tech school or jobs keep coming back to update Garey and Greg and Tim on their lives.  These men are a safe haven for young accomplishments.  They are three men who listen, and they have made a world of difference in several young men’s lives.